Not 100% sure that I am...

I don't think i am 100percent gay.

Actually. I dont know whether I am at all.
Why the fuck would someone violate me when i was that little, it has fucked up my entire life and created all of this confusion. ARGH. Asshole. ima punch him.

What am I suppose to do with this? My ex told me the other day that it is best to try with girls and guys so that ur not limited to just one.. and guys are fine.. and so are girls..
I dont think I will ever be able to walk down the street and not look at that yummy boi with the slim body, muscular... etc.
But what about girls? Tits and ass dont really tickle my fancy. So maybe I am asexual? Meaning im not sure about guys or girls. I think thats what that means.
I do want to try with a girl.. but I havnt found the right one.
Im sure God would forgive me if i sinned once in an effort to correct my neverending homo sinning lol.

What do I do about Joel?
FUCK. Why does life have to be so fucking confusing?????
ARGHHHHHHHHHH i wish i would just be totally into girls, even be like everyone else i know and bonks everything with two legs and a pussy. Shit. why does my head have to be so screwed up? Im thinking i need a councellor.. but what good will that do?

My mind obviously is telling me that I am not really into guys, coz there have been some errrr issues... performance wise... and im totally not that keen on being randy by myself anymore.
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK.

Well thats my blog for today.
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